Chapter 7 - What Makes You Come Alive? (Passion, Day 5) | Begin with “I” by Rohit Sethi - Self Help Learning PDF Download

What Makes You Come  alive? (Passion, Day 5)

“Don’t ask what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” ~ Howard Thurman

The morning ritual and car pool seem fixed. Ron+ has indicated to Ron that once his new morning ritual becomes firm in three to four weeks, Ron must start waking up forty-five minutes earlier to move his run from evening to morning as exercising in the morning kick-starts the metabolism and energizes one for the rest of the day.

Work seems more positive than usual, understandably as it is Friday. It is strange how people understand that their moods are better on days they have something to look forward to, for instance, Fridays or the last few days in office before vacation. However, they still don’t consciously design more of those elements into their lives and continue to suffer boredom.

This is day 5 of the ten days that Ron+ will stay with Ron. Ron already appreciates the wisdom of Ron+ in all life areas. Ron is happy that he is growing every day but is bit anxious at the same time as he realizes that knowledge by itself is not power. It becomes power only once it is applied correctly and consistently.

“Ron, let’s talk about the first element within Inspiration. I call it ‘Passion’; some others might call it ‘Purpose’ or ‘Calling’. This is a sensitive topic among people for two reasons:

1. There is a widespread belief that people who found their passions are living ideal lives; I have already shared my views on how this might not be true

2. It is estimated that around 95% people do not know what they are passionate about and hence feel disappointed with discussions around this topic

My views on this topic are a bit strong. I really feel that some people use lack of a clear passion as a mechanism to rationalize and continue living within their comfort zones. Let’s get into the details so you will understand my view better.”

Principle 1: It is normal to not have a single passion in one’s life

“Most people are like zombies, working in jobs week-in week-out. They are not fully happy but then not so unhappy either, that they go ahead and make any change. This in-between zone is commonly known as the ‘comfort zone’, and as we already discussed, is exactly where nothing of extraordinary significance is ever created! I can safely conclude that this is where you are too. Do you agree?”

Figure 26: Comfort zone versus extraordinary

“Yes, pretty much!”

“Inspiration comes from being ‘in spirit’. It is that magical feeling where you experience being ‘in the zone’. Time does not exist, you do not exist, and you are completely unaware of your surroundings.”

“Hmm… Can you share your views on the various means in which a person can get inspired?”

“In my experience, inspiration can come through one or more of the three means:

1. An art form – You might come across some form of art that really interests you. You start experimenting with it and realize that you can ‘hit your zone’ doing it
2. A role model – You come across a person who is either alive now or was in the past, and feel energized with their life stories and actions. It can be the vision set up by this person that fills you up with excitement. As Steve Jobs said, ‘Let’s make a dent in the universe’. These are inspiring words!
3. A higher cause – Some cause involving a community, may click with you and makes you feel strongly about it”

“It is estimated that 95% people do not know their passions. In my view, the real number is lesser. There are more people who know what interests them, just that they keep ignoring these interests so that their little worlds, that is, the comfort zones, are not disturbed. Taking concrete steps and moving in the direction of their dreams will require them to put in serious effort to do something new which would be a stretch from their regular lives.”

“There are more people who know what interests them, just that they keep ignoring these interests so that their little worlds, that is, comfort zones, are not disturbed.”

Principle 2: An interest becomes a passion not before you fight for it

“When you are passionate about something, you feel a fire within you. It’s like finding something you can die for. It’s like finding a cause that you can dedicate the rest of your life for. As Martin Luther King said, ‘If you haven’t found something worth dying for, you aren’t fit to be living.’ And the key thing really is this: When this fire first reveals itself to you, it reveals itself as a small spark. Some claim this is God’s plan to test if you are capable of taking the idea and running with it. In my experience, these sparks are being revealed to people all the time. It’s just that we are too busy to pay attention to the spark and even when we do, we let it die out, instead of protecting and feeding it until it grows into a magnificent flame for others to see and experience.”

“We are too busy to pay attention to the spark and even when we do, we let it die out, instead of protecting and feeding it until it grows into a magnificent flame for others to see and experience.”

“I strongly feel that it is not about the topic, but about people, who need to develop stronger mental muscles to fight for their sparks!”

“I understand! Do you have any suggestions around this?”

“It is possible to let everyone you meet, know that there’s one thing about you that is not up for discussion: You are going to achieve your dreams no matter what others say about it. There is no room for compromise. Be absolutely certain in your mind and act as if what you desire has already happened.”

“It is possible to let everyone you meet, know that there’s one thing about you that is not up for discussion: You are going to achieve your dreams no matter what others say about it.”

“One of the fundamental truths in life is that people, who get most approval from others, tend to care less about it. They have followed their heart and are independent of what others say about them. If they really listened to people around them, they may have stopped pursuing their passions long ago.”

“Sure, I completely understand!”

Principle 3: Do not wait for life to give you your passions, bring your own passion to life

“Most people complain that they do not know their passions. I agree that there are people who do not know them. But if you look closely, you will find they do not even put in any efforts for this. They continue in their 9 to 5 jobs with their limiting beliefs. Any new idea is rejected. Given the understanding we have on self-image now, deep down, most people have conflicting desires and do not really see themselves worthy of big successes.”

“In most cases, a passion doesn’t appear automatically. A good way to start is to bring passion to everything you do. Making a goal out of finding your passion and chasing it directly, might only lead to anxiety and disappointment. Inspiration is a pure feeling. It is independent of the task and comes from the impact one creates. Do not always look outside to find inspiration. Bring inspiration to all that you do.”

“Bring passion to everything you do. Making a goal out of finding your passion and chasing it directly, might only lead to anxiety and disappointment.”

“As I said couple of days ago, instead of complaining about the lack of passion, if everyone just becomes passionate about becoming their pluses, that is, better versions of themselves, the world will begin to transform. Think about this. If everyone was their best self, many of the problems we face in the world will immediately go away.

• If everyone was more engaged and mindful at their job, there would be less rework and mistakes, enhancing overall productivity
• If everyone felt good about themselves, they would complement others freely and initiate a network effort of appreciation, where positivity continues to expand as every person shares it with more people
• If everyone felt loved, they would share love with others and create thriving and fulfilling relationships
• And so on…”

“So Ron+, what do you recommend as a general approach?”

“Train yourself to show enthusiasm in all that you do. Being a positive feeling, enthusiasm has a high energy frequency and resonates closer to the creative power of the universe. In fact, the word enthusiasm comes from ancient Greek – ‘en and theos’ – meaning God. Another related word, ‘enthousiazein’ means ‘to be possessed by God’. Since enthusiasm is a contagious feeling, the more you show it, the more people you attract to support you in all that you are trying to do.”

“It is possible to bring your own enthusiasm. Having clarity on where you are headed in life, being content, and being fine with how you spend your time everyday are good ways to enable oneself to have higher enthusiasm overall.”

“Let’s do some exercises to assess and build on your passion levels.”

Exercise 1: Baseline your passion: How much passion do you bring to each of your life areas?

“Ron, this is the first time you are doing this exercise. Let’s begin with baselining your passion levels. Are you someone who is naturally more excited about life? Or are you dragging yourself along every day? On all life areas, score yourself 1-10 on the passion you think you bring to each of the areas. It will be great if you can also capture some points in the rationale or comments column.”

Ron takes some time to fill out the table.

Table 6: Ron’s current passion level

“Okay, fair enough!  Let’s look at how we can design where you want to go.”

Exercise 2: Design the leap to next level: Think about how much passion you ideally want to bring to each of your life areas

“Ron, please indicate your target score for each of the areas. How much would you ideally like to score? Also, add comments on how you would know if that has happened.”

Ron fills out his target table. He chooses a 9 for each of the target scores.

Table 7: Ron’s target passion level

Exercise 3: Take the leap

“Since we have already conducted this exercise couple of times, I will leave this to you. Make a list of activities and tasks that you need to do to achieve these scores. Organize them into a roadmap with timelines as you did for Charisma. As you put activities against timelines, it will become easy to track progress.”

“Find out areas where you are holding yourself back the most and dig deeper to understand the root causes. These are the areas where, if you make progress, you will be able to provide a strong impetus to all other areas. In your case, it could be physical, that is, your health. Since you have never focused on this area before, you do not know how it will be to feel more energetic than you do now. It might enable you to use that extra energy to progress in other areas. It can be the same with relationships. Once you feel comfortable, loved and secure in your relationships, your motivation to progress in other areas might increase significantly.”

Exercise 4: Potential areas of passion: List the areas you are interested in

“Once you become someone who brings more passion to everything that you do, you will be closer to identifying those few topics that ignite you with total enthusiasm. Let me introduce to you two powerful exercises that can help you here:

1. Sit in a comfortable and quiet place. Relax your mind and ask yourself, ‘If I was to be given my financial independence today, that is, I do not have to work for money anymore, what is it that I would like to do all day?’ Visualize yourself living that life. See what your home would look like. See who you will have around you. See what you see yourself doing. Hear what you will be hearing. Feel what you will feel then. In most instances, the activities that you see yourself doing, will give you an indication of the activities or topics you are enthusiastic about
2.  Spend time increasing your awareness about the world of unconventional careers, and see what others are doing with their lives. Observe them with an open mind without letting your mind jump in to tell you how it would not work in your case. Our minds are really good at this! I am not telling you to see what others are doing so that you can imitate them. I want you to become more aware. See if there is anything that resonates with you.”

“Ron, do you have a vision? Is there something that you absolutely want to do in this life?”

“Well, as I told you earlier, I have been struggling to find the answers to my questions for years now. If I can find the answers, I would like to share them with as many people as I can, so that they do not have to struggle as much.”

“Fantastic, that is quite a noble thought. Let me caution you beforehand. When you start, it is possible that you face resistance from people around you. The key is to keep at it until you succeed. As Arthur Schopenhaur said, ‘All truths go through three steps: 

1.  It is ridiculed
2.  It is violently opposed
3.  It is accepted as self-evident’”

“As Mahatma Gandhi said, ‘First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win’. Over the coming days, we will cover the topic of ‘Mind Control’ that is about building a stronger mental muscle to help you hang in there even when the going gets tough. Of course, if you continue to persist, you will get there eventually!”

“Thanks Ron+ for your encouragement. I was thinking about this just a few days ago. Even if I have a vague idea on wanting to do something different, I do not even have five people around me who believe that I can do it. How under such circumstances, can I even imagine achieving it?”

“I understand. But, you are not the only one! Most people do not have these five people around them. It is not easy but, it is not impossible either, to build a network of positive people around you. If you really want to realize your goal, you will find people who will encourage you no matter what. For most self-help and personal development concepts to work, it is important to have an environment that enables you. Or else, you will be sucked back into our LAU!”

“What’s LAU?”

“Not something standard! I just made it up – Life-As-Usual!”

They both laugh. “Ron, let’s call it a day now. We will discuss ‘Mind Control’ in detail in the coming days.”